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Who needs an ego?

Even though the ego ('Me', the great 'I Am') sees itself as a stand-alone entity capable of an autonomous existence, it can't exist separately from the world in which it lives, in the same way that a fish can't live independently of the water that surrounds it. To live an authentic life, we need to become aware of what we truly are, rather than what the ego is trying to be. Ego is nothing more than an abstract construct - a personal filing cabinet of fixed and obsolete attitudes and patterns of behaviour; a collection of intangible concepts made up of plans, ambitions, dreams, fantasies, goals - that mistakenly believes that it has the power to manipulate the material reality of the physical world in which it lives and breathes.

The unitive approach to coaching works to heal the split, inherent in our Western tradition and language, between subject and object. The way to regain our authenticity is by realising that what we imagine as being 'us' - that which makes each of us regard ourselves as special - is not something which we have the power to wilfully manipulate but is simply the random result of the interaction between the environment in which we find ourselves and our physical and psychic inheritance. To finally achieve peace and authenticity, we need to go with the flow - accept that we have no autonomous will of our own; are not separate but immersed, during our entire lives, in the ever-changing and fluid world-flux in which we swim.

Real life coaching may be a road less travelled, but it leads directly to a tranquil place. By showing us as individuals how to disregard the anxious demands of the imperceptive ego, we become aware of the unique place we occupy in space and time. We realise that human beings are not isolated units but linked together as part of a universal Whole that is greater than the sum of its parts.